June 30, 2012
Talk about living large. After last night's Blair Witch Project, I decided to find the most luxurious, posh, and decadent campground possible. So of course I wound up at a KOA. As the Good Doctor once said about Las Vegas,"It's what the whole hip world would look like if the Nazis had won World War II."
I was never sure what he meant and it's too late to ask but if you squint and look out of the corner of your eye, this place sort of fits the description. There's a man-made lake, a giant bouncy ball about half the size of a polo pitch and tonight we've got a DJ.
The joint is crawling with kids all hopped up on Red Vines and Mountain Dew so of course KOA gives them all recumbent tricycles to zip around on. These sugar-crazed prepubescents have no regard for their own or other's welfare. I just saw a three-bike smash-up over by the put put miniature golf thing.
The windmill looks like a total loss.